Comics: As I See It

Oh, the lament of the Maid of Might. Being Superman’s secret weapon isn’t an easy job, oh no. She can never confide her greatest hopes and dreams in any girl her age!     That is, until she hears a voice in her head telling her to head into the forest. Great. One of the most powerful beings on the planet, and she blithely listen to the voices in her head. Well, luckily it turns out to be Saturn Girl who invites Supergirl to try out for Legion membership again.

She agrees, and they all fly off to the 30th Century, where Supergirl meets Brainiac 5 for the first time. Hubba, hubba. He explains that he is the descendant of Superman’s villainous foe, and he wants to make up for his ancestor’s misdeeds. Of course, she wonders if he’s being sincere or not. He’s a Brainiac after all. Soon enough, they’re all off to perform their initiation ritual, in this case digging up a bunch of Terran artifacts. Universities must love this.

But, wait, what’s this?!? A kryptonite meteor hurtles towards Earth, and wouldn’t you know, directly for the Legionnaires.  Oh the humanity! Brainy gives his force-field belt to Supergirl so she can go after it. She does and the meteor is destroyed! The LSH cleans up the debris while the Girl of Steel thanks Brainy for risking his life to save hers. Awwww. Both Supergirl and Brainy are inducted. Brainy for “noble courage.” You ask me, he just calculated the odds, as usual.

Despite Brainy’s, ah, sweet offer for Supergirl to stay in the 30th Century and “be his girl,” she goes home with his force-field belt. What does our heroine do once back home? Treasure hunt! Yup, she wants to test her new force-field belt. Obviously, despite his offer of “being his girl”, she doesn’t trust him. Y’know, because he’s a Brainiac. So, she sets off to the depths of the ocean with Lori Lemurs and Jerro the Mer-Boy. Who declares his undying love for her. Every panel. Yeah, I think I’d get a restraining order at that point.

The object of her quest is a chunk of kryptonite buried in a chest. Don’t think too hard about it, folks. She takes the rock out into space, apparently leaving the swooning mer-boy behind. She buries it deep inside a lead asteroid and heads for home. Uh oh. While flying over a mine where they are doing some blasting, rocks fly up and break the belt. Wait, so, she flies back through time, the crushing deep of the ocean, and the depths of space… and the force-field belt is undone by a rock sent up by blasting in a  mine? I need to take my own advice and not think too hard about it.

Anyway, with her adventure over Supergirl heads back to her secret identity at the Midvale orphanage. There, she tells the poor saps that live there with her that she doesn’t have no boyfriends. But, she says winkingly to the reader, completely destroying the fourth wall in the process, how can she tell them that she had two boyfriends? One in the far flung future, and one beneath the waves.

Wow. Supergirl is a player!

Until tomorrow.